Ever met an ‘opinionated person’? We all have opinions and pretty good ones at that! The question is not whether we are right but rather are we being useful.
Rudolph Dreikurs, the famous Chicago psychiatrist, advocated having the ‘courage to be imperfect’ as an antidote to our superiority of personal opinion among other things.
If you can’t help but give your opinion, start with a brief summary that encompasses the issue using the words of others, especially the words of those 180 degrees different than you.
“It seems to me that Dr. Shaw feels the anesthesia group is being systematically excluded from the decisions of the board…and I wonder if this inclusion could begin to be accomplished with an outside facilitator rather than at this meeting right now.” This might be a better response than, “I disagree that we have to do this at this meeting.”
Anytime you begin with “I disagree..." "Are you serious..." "Are you kidding me..." be very, very careful. Each of those statements activates the amygdala and you will be in for a fight, a flight, or a freeze…not a “We can figure this out together.”